Archive for October, 2010

The “other side”- A ghost of a chance

There are “ghosts” in Lorain – you see them all the time- you pass by them, sometimes you mutter words of disbelief as they come into you line of vision.

They are the remains of what was once a full and rich life- they are the homes and monuments of those that called this place – Lorain- home. They have had their lives taken from them by a deadly plague- the plague of neglect/progress – they that still stand are used and abused – prostituted for greed, or totally destroyed. Very few survive the plague of progress.

However , one house the Moore House, built in 1906 stands as a testament to the lives of those that walked these streets and built these streets- lived in these homes – thanks to the efforts and tenacity of the Black River Historical Society.
http://www.loraincityhistory.org/history_of_moorehouse.html
October 30th, found the house hosting a party of one which was probably not in any of its previous inhabitants social calendar

Nikki, my daughter, and I decided to avail ourselves of the opportunity to walk the hallway and rooms with the folk from O.R.B.S. We were on the 9:30 pm group hunt.

We arrived to find Kelly Boyer Sagert with hot cider and delicious donuts welcoming our intrepid “hunters of the spirits”. There were 12 of us for the 9:30 hunt. Nikki and I were pretty much the novices, the others in the party had their special cameras , laser thingamajigs, and digital recorders etc. They certainly had more knowledge than we did as to how these hunts/tours work and had been on numerous other ” hunts”.

Nikki and I decided to split, she went with the one group and I with the other . Things were quiet in the basement – my group spent about 30 minutes in each area of the house from basement to attic. One piece of the O.R.B.S equipment amplified a woman’s voice answering

YES!

to the question

“Do you want us to leave?”

– there was no response to a few other questions but once again a definite

Yes

came through the static when asked again –

“Do you want us to leave?”



The “hunt ” finished for this group around 11:30 –

Nikki’s group had also had some activity . One of the participants, more sensitive than most upon hearing and feeling something used her camera-and captured an orb and a shadowy something on the film where a cold spot was felt.

Kelly, was waiting for the midnight hunt and a chance to get warm. Kelly had her own cold spot ( 5 hours worth) taking tickets and handing out refreshments to the participants as she sat patiently in the garage of the Moore House.

Meanwhile Nikki and I, after availing ourselves of another donut and hot cider, joined up with our groups at the Charleston Pioneer Cemetery as Diane Medina told the stories of this city’s founding fathers and “mothers” and continued the tour.

However by 12:30 the “cold spot” got the better of us and we headed home to bed.

One benefit of the hunt I noticed was the participants became fascinated by the museums artifacts and decor but since we were in the “dark” more than one decided to come back during “daylight” for a closer look at “The Moore House”

All in all a very enjoyable and facinating evening and just maybe those goosebumps weren’t all down to the weather!

October 31, 2010 at 5:36 am 9 comments

MEDICAL INSURANCE- NOT ALL EQUAL


There are many many people in the cyber world who are fighting for their lives and some like Hillary are fighting for their life and also medical coverage to be equal.

All I wanted was equal quality and accessible health care for all, but even when Americans had to make no change if they didn’t want to and were offered the congressional health plan, people still screamed about rationing and the possibility of even larger soaring health care costs.

What did we get?

Well, with the little reform that made it through, inflation has all ready eased. Insurance still cost 14% more than last year and americans still have no recourse but to pay the rising costs, but that’s better than the 28% last year.

And we are starting to ration.

This young woman is amazing and I would suggest you follow her thoughts as she continues to fight.

Chris Carr from Chris Alt Delete blog said in his most recent post

My situation (or anyone who will have to fight cancer for the rest of their lives after losing their job) is difficult in that I would like to go back to work if I could find a job but who is going to hire someone who has chronic cancer (especially in this economy)? Not to mention, what insurance company is going to carry me? The laws against discriminating against pre-existing conditions don’t kick in until 2014. So, for me to go back to work, I’d be taking a huge gamble that quite frankly I can’t afford to take.


Although MY Chris, my son, fought the same battles had the same treatment his coverage from insurance was amazing.

You see when he married Angela- he married into the Cleveland Clinic ‘s medical insurance- now coverage there for their Dr. employees is a lot different from what I am covered for and possibly yours.

Apart from the “professional courtesy charges” – they don’t pay the same when professional courtesy is applied…. EVERYTHING AND I MEAN EVERYTHING 100% was covered in Chris’ case.

Both stem cell transplants, the chemo, the hospital stays even the tests on the trial- apart from the initial deductible ( which we paid) not one penny for any medical tests , procedures were billed, all prescriptions once the deductible was met ( which we also paid for gladly)- the only thing it cost Angela and Chris was the parking fees at the hospital. There was NO CAP of their insurance………..

The fundraiser , for which I am still trying to find the words to write about- was NOT for medical expenses but for plane tickets and travel expenses to Texas- those unfortunately are not covered by anyones insurances- how Hillary and Chris Carr and others fighting this “curable cancer“( Hodgkin’s Lymphoma) manage is beyond my ken.

I wish everyone had the coverage that Chris was able to receive- for his wife to walk away from the loss of Chris with no debt is a very rare thing in the non Dr. world. In that respect she was lucky, certainly luckier than most in the same circumstances

It is bad enough that people are fighting for their lives but then to be faced with huge medical bills it too is an obscenity .

I don’t know what the ‘Health Insurance ” answer is in this country but for Hillary, Chris, Beckha , Mike and millions in this country that face this every day – I want equality!

October 28, 2010 at 3:45 pm 15 comments

And the winner is for Lorain County Beautiful Awards

UPDATE: Coverage Morning Journal
http://www.morningjournal.com/articles/2010/10/31/news/mj3553222.txtCheck it out !
http://www.locophotogblog.com/?p=552

October 27, 2010 at 1:48 am 2 comments

To sleep- perchance to – PTSD


The stuff dreams are made of………….

Apart from a few days in Texas I have not slept properly since that terrible day in February 2008, when a phone call started the silent screaming.

I was told once that dreams are the way your brain tries to make sense of your day, your thoughts, life circumstances and to put them in some sort of order so they can be “filed” . There are times that upon waking you ask

Did I dream that or did that actually happen?



My poor brain is having a terrible time trying to make sense of my thoughts , flash backs, trigger memories and life happenings. I have, during my waking hours, been unable to make sense of what has happened , trying to make sense of it when sleeping is just not happening.

My brain tries nightly to file , it puts together stories only to find the body responding badly . The brain is supposed to be in control, but there is a usurper stronger than the brain – it is my grief . The body, far from resting, is pummelled hourly by a sound bites of life and experiences, thoughts and fears.

Try as it might the brain is furiously trying to sort, file and catalogue so the body can heal with sleep.

The brain tries to categorize my son and his place in this netherworld of real and what is not real. The brain once more gives him a voice I can no longer hear when awake, a form , a dimension, a story line that is supposed to make some sort of sense,to bring some order to the disorder.

Bits and pieces of the day , a boat seen on a television program, the sound of an F150 truck starting up in a parking lot , a conversation , people and events encountered or thought of , longing , triggers all go into making up the “to be filed “ but try as the brain might the stories cause the body to once more wake to save itself.

Far from relief or rest , the jumbled images of life, dying, longing and anger are too much and the body wakes from one nightmare to another.

It seems my brain has divided into two parts upon waking . I can access “files of life” before that December 3rd day, I carry them with me they are scanning , flipping sorted through like some Rolodex file on steroids, the rest of my brain seems to be on remote pause .
<

I now know you can be in two places at the same time. As my husband , mother watch as I walk to the refrigerator , opening the door , grabbing the bottle of cranberry juice little do they realize I am actually a couple of thousand of miles away and in 2009 not 2010 in another kitchen in Texas , opening a refrigerator door getting another bottle of juice.

Chris in that dreadful college apartment
I have discovered I can live simultaneously in the past and present . The ordinary things in everyday life can be a time machine – bagging the kitchen garbage instantly transports me back to the parking garage of last October and Chris throwing the Texas trash into the garbage chute . I watch my son as I wait by the car with the Purell . He walks once more toward me, his smile and then I am instantaneously in his dreadful college apartment – a kitchen less than desirable for a meal – so to sharing lunch in Little Italy.

These journeys take but a millisecond and to the watcher – they are unaware I have left- it is so quick, they have not missed me .

My husband opening a can of creamed corn sent me reeling back to the Bone Marrow Unit at the Cleveland Clinic as they pumped back into his body his stem cells . The preservative in the cells smelled exactly like creamed corn.

And yet to the onlooker I am in my kitchen doing mundane things being normal????????? BUT the truth be known there is only part of me , like a substantive shadow that lingers in this world, going through the motions.

The researcher that was me and why is this happening part of my brain wants the reasoning for why I am no longer me- and on this journey I find I am no longer Tourjour Moi . I have SOME ( not all) symptoms of PTSD –
http://www.medicinenet.com/posttraumatic_stress_disorder/page4.htm

” Time to get help they cry”- “Time to get on with life -“Time will heal” TIME…….


yes TIME but time is exactly what I am dealing with……… my brain on drugs just makes the travel hazy- the time travel is still there – I know the why it is happening. I know why my brain is trying so hard- I know the help and resources available – but the journeys continue as the Gorilla of Grief is my pilot and the IT is my vehicle

You never know what dreams may come………………………….

October 26, 2010 at 11:36 am 7 comments

Lorain Dude – Election Lorain 2010


Word had it that Nag Nog was not going to vote! Now there is one thing that I have learned on my short time on this planet (all of my 18 months) is that the right to vote has been fought for for a long long time. I was not going to let Nag Nog let the side down!

Mummy and I got into the car- I, of course in my special seat and insisted Nag Nog come with us to this special place where you can vote before voting day and you can vote early

Although Nag Nog pleaded that she hadn’t studied all the issues and didn’t want to “vote for the lesser of two evils” – Mummy and I struck whilst the iron was hot and Nag Nog wasn’t in her pajamas for once!

I have to say I was a little disappointed that I was 16 /12 years TOO EARLY and had to stay in the car with Nana whilst Mummy and Nag Nog voted hmmmmmmmm

wonder what the lesser of two evils means anyway?

NAG NOG NOTE:
So , yes, in order to set a good example , I went and voted. Since I haven’t been too involved with the information pouring through my mail box (not that I pay too much attention to those anway- “the only thing you can’t spin is a suppository”),
For the first time I had NO clear idea of how I was going to vote.

I hadn’t done my homework. There were one or two races for which I had a preference and one or two issues but the rest- apart from not voting for anyone who was unopposed ( Stewart and Betleski etc) for example.

And if I really wasn’t sure which way to go – I didn’t – then it was a case of eenie/ meenie…. not a format I would endorse but best I could do ……..

So there you have it an uneducated voter voted”!

AND if my one vote is the tipping point either way don’t blame me – it was all the Lorain Dude’s fault 🙂
HOWEVER YOU CAN VOTE FOR THE KIDS AND IT WON’T COST YOU A PENNY

The Longfellow News Crew wrote a Bing grant for at least $50,000 or more to try for a new production studio and it has been accepted at the first level. Now we have moved to the second level to get ratings.

We need your help, please, to rate our need at our school. We have until Oct. 26th to improve our rating and the school with the highest ratings win. The students worked very hard to put together this grant and we really need the studio moved into the digital age of technology.
Please click on the link below to our grant or if you have problems click the link at the bottom on 7-9 grade level on page 3 project number 1883 Title of the grant Longfellow Needs a New Production Studio

In order to rate our school you will have to log in first.

http://ourschoolneeds.discoverbing.com/projects/default.aspx?prj=1883#fbid=HoUtKk6mTII&wom=false

http://ourschoolneeds.discoverbing.com

October 24, 2010 at 4:35 pm 3 comments

Blue Heron Rookery – safe!

Blue Heron Lorain - Photo Mark Teleha

Just to update I contacted Mr. Timko , Lorain Utilities Dept with regard to the Blue Heron Blues

Here is what the site looked like before we cleaned it up. ( above) – No heron nests just mill waste. We are restoring it to what it looked like in 1904. We have original topographic maps for the late 1800’s. By next year this will all be green. The heron rookery is being expanded from the original 12 acres to almost 40. Almost a mile over river is under conservation easement. Ohio EPA visited last Monday and said it was their largest and favorite project.



Here is an aerial of the site. The heron rookery is the small piece that jets out on the left hand side of the picture. The area we are cleaning up is on the right and has white Lime, flue dust and slag left over from 100 years.

“ED NOTE”- the good thing about the mix -up and there is a good side to this – people cared- people were ready to stand behind Lorain’s wildlife and publicity has been drawn to our beautiful Blue Heron- Thanks to everyone for their input and concern on behalf of the Blue Heron – another of Lorain’s assets featured.

October 22, 2010 at 2:51 pm 3 comments

Blue Heron Blues – Nesting Sites Gone- by Whose Authority

Please check out Mark’s post on this very sad affair-
http://www.locophotogblog.com/?p=549

October 22, 2010 at 12:32 pm 2 comments

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