Archive for June 7, 2011

What Day Would You Choose ?


I read this article the other day

After two car crashes Michelle Philpots suffered injuries which causes her to have 24 hour memory .

‘When I wake up everything outside my window is the same, its hard to explain, but everyday to me is the same normal day. ‘It’s like I am living the same day after day

I wondered if you had to live the same 24 hour period over and over again for the rest of your life and you had a choice, what day in your life would you choose? There are plenty I wouldn’t choose and wish I could erase from my memory – but what day would I choose to be locked away in the prison of my mind?

Actually, for me, it didn’t take very long to decide .

The day was actually a Christmas Eve day and night. A family trip – my dad was still alive and was visiting- I had my whole immediate family ( small as we are) surrounding me – all the people I loved best in the world shared that special day.

The place was a lovely condo on the side of the ski slopes at Smugglers Notch, Vermont

Timid _ art work by Chris Ritchey

Click to enlarge

The day was spent with Nikki taking lessons on the “art of skiing”- my husband rolling down the slopes for the most part -for all the slope to see ( he had purchased flourescent lime green ski pants because they were on sale- hint there was probably a reason they were so cheap- no one else would buy them) his lime green roly poly style of getting down the mountain also caused his children to pretend they didn’t know him) 🙂

Chris , a flash of red as he insisted, after his initial wariness , coming down the mountain as fast as he could to slide into the lift area with a swirl of snow to go right back up again. By the end of the day I watched as he raced over the moguls- my heart in my mouth but a grin on his face that could melt the snow .

As I found the series on “past , present , future – graphic design for timid- confidence- aggressive ” I knew, looking at the art work for the project as to what my son was relating the assignment – it was a snowy Christmas eve of happiness.

Agressive - art work by Chris Ritchey

Click to enlarge

My dad sitting on the balcony with a hot toddy watching the fun and mum cooking the turkey and all the trimmings.

The evening found us on a snowy sleigh ride with much laughter as the horses had “gas” -my mum looking pointedly at my dad as he had polished off two helpings of Christmas pudding and thought to be the culprit!

The night was topped off with the torchlight parade as the skiers came down the slopes escorting a skiing Santa Claus- ending with the burning of an out-house to ensure more snow followed by Christmas fireworks and singing ( Don’t eat yellow snow).

It was a wonderful few days and one that I would only wish I could live over and over.

Instead every day I relive ( unbidden) the last hours of my dying son December 3rd , the cruelty visited by fate and another family who did not deserve my son.

How I wish we were still that small group that loved and laughed freely that Christmas Eve. How different could life have been had not the obscenity of cancer that February 15th not happened and pestilence of diseased and selfish cruelty brought home to this family because the fateful wedding of that June 7th Angela (Lombardi) became Angela ritchey D O and with that union enabled her to inflict such pain to our small group. ( Because they can)

It is said death of a loved one reminds us of our own mortality – take it from me being mortal is “nae bad thing”– My eyes have flooded with tears every day ( sometimes if I am strong and fight them they arrive only a couple of times a day) for the past 18 months. I am not strong enough to stop their onslaught for more than a few hours at a time . There are days, like this past Sunday, it took all I had left just to make it through the day – to continue- how I long to get lost in happiness once more – to laugh -to see the smile on the face of my son…………………..

Sometimes I think I can cry no more only to have the flood gates open……….. Yes! if I could live a day over it would be a snowy Christmas Eve in Vermont and three days that I wish could be taken from time………………

Note: The series, now framed hangs on the wall of Gavin’s playroom- words from his uncle for him as he grows to rush at life with a smile on his face and surrounded by those that love him.


June 7, 2011 at 12:03 am Leave a comment



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June 2011